Hello friends and family,
Well, it is time. As I write these words, Chris and I are eating our last Sunday breakfast at New Hope. We are sipping coffee, reading our Bibles, and having bread with peanut butter and jelly. I will miss these quiet mornings.Although, there are many many birds competing for singer of the day and a large, no let me rephrase that, humongous bee just flew past our windows. I will miss them. Not the bee, but the birds. Some of them sound like monkeys in the trees, another sounds like a firecracker that is taking off, not exploding. I have to say I love the birds here. They are fascinating and there is such a great variety. Just yesterday I saw one that I had never seen before and grabbed (dragged) Chris and made him chase the two birds with me so I could get a picture. We tracked them by their big orange beaks. It was fun.
This morning as we woke up, we paused for a minute before getting out of bed. Almost 5 months has passed since we left Colorado. I will be honest, some days here have been difficult and felt like we'd never get home. Most of the time though it has gone too quickly. But, we are ready to come home to you all, and yet we grieve leaving the new people that God has tucked into our hearts.
I have been reflecting back on our time here and how at times we felt like we weren't interacting enough with the Ugandans like we would on a mission team where it is go go go. I questioned myself like have I done enough here? Have I taken advantage of every moment with the people in this country? What if I never come back here? Have I done enough for God? My questions so often are not the right ones when looking at myself. Oh, how wonderful is God when he turns around our thinking!
Yesterday when I was about to leave for dinner, one of the teenage Ugandan girls who is our next door neighbor came up to say hello to me. I have not had much interaction with her other than a hug now an again as she passes by with laundry or a hug on the paths as she returns from school. It's not like we've had in depth conversations about God or anything. Anyway, as she spoke to me she was smiling and asking me when our schooling was finished. I told her we graduate this Friday and leave New Hope Saturday. Her reaction moved my heart. She stood there all of the sudden without her beautiful smile and kept saying "That is too soon, too soon." She would not look at me but stood straighter and said, "Then let me pray for you." She thanked God for me, asked Him to be with me wherever I go, and in whatever I am doing and then said Amen. I prayed the same thing for her and hugged her but she walked away with tears in her eyes.
In that moment with that simple prayer, God showed me how hard it is going to be to say goodbye. He also taught me something else. As I said a moment ago, I was asking the questions have I done enough for God, have I built enough relationships? But God corrected me. As I have learned over and over here, the main focus should never be what it is that I have done for Him. Because, truly, can we ever outdo God?
I should always be viewing life out of a heart that has a deep knowledge of what He has done for me. I was brought here to learn, to be equipped, to experience Him in a specific way so that I can be better able to minister to people and bring His love wherever I go. Bringing Him into a place is not about what I do or how many people I "share" God with, or even about where I go. It is about relationship, always.
My error in thinking was that I was too focused on the "who" in regards to building relationship. I am going to Uganda so therefore all of my time and effort and heart needs to be spent on the Ugandans. That is not bad, but it wasn't God's focus for us this time. Don't get me wrong, we built relationships with Ugandans, and I weep even now as I think about saying goodbye to the ones who have shared their tears of joy and sorrow with me.
As I asked the questions above, God whispered to my heart, "Aimee, I am about relationship." As my neighbor friend, who shares my name walked away with tears in her eyes He reminded me, that is the result of relationship. As I look at the kitchen staff who have become some of the most special ladies to me during my time here, that is relationship. As I reflect back upon all the nights where our couch had other Westerners on it crying or praying or laughing hysterically at each other, even farting at times, that is relationship. When I remember Wilber and Charles, two of the young Ugandan men who sat on our couch and laughed and ate milky ways and jelly beans with us, one a musician and one a writer, that is relationship. As Chris and our friend Rukundo sat at a table together eating tiny Ugandan peppers and sweating, that is relationship.
Even as I write this, a young Ugandan man is greeting my husband outside and they are talking about school and cutting firewood, and the young man just said, "How is Aunt?" (That is me.) That is relationship.
The truth is that as we experience relationship, God builds a foundation on which to reveal Himself to people. He alone is God and there is no other. If you look at all the other religions in this world, there is only one God whose heart is to be in relationship with His people. They are not just worker bees or those enslaved to do things for Him. The one true God, my God, is a relational God who wants to share every day life with us and that is what we have experienced here. God is in those hugs on the path as kids come home from school. God is in the kitchen as you cook for others to keep them well fed. God is in the conversations as you walk to "do" something.
Wherever we go, Africa or the US, as we follow God with intention and live our lives for something greater than ourselves, the reality is that when you share anything with another person it is most powerful in relationship. Over the centuries as we have tried to share God with people I think we have forgotten this perspective. God is bringing it back into the churches now, but there is a long way to go. Every one of us is relational whether we believe in God or not. What is built in those relationships is based on what we believe relationship is for. Are your relationships serving you or is it serving something greater? Do your relationships reveal you or do they proclaim what it is you believe in? Just something to think about.
Again, God has tucked people into our hearts here in Uganda and what they have shared with us we look forward to bringing back and sharing with you. Have we learned a lot? Have we been changed? That is for you to tell us. Our hearts are reflected in relationship just as God's is. That is His design. We have been so blessed by your emails and all your birthday packages for my husband. He was well loved by you all. Thank you, that is relationship. As we cry tears as we prepare to leave here, we also cry with relief and anticipation in getting to be reunited with others who are in our hearts back home.
See you all soon dear ones. Thanksgiving will be special this year for us.
Thank you God for how you build family, anywhere in the world, in the every day things. That is true relationship.
Love you all,
Aimee and Chris
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